Bravado Living

One of our good friends here at Bravado Living happens to be a City of Miami Police Officer. Luckily for us, he writes our tickets off. Luckily for you, he told us how to get out of ticket. You’re lucky we love you because this is some good information.

Tickets are nasty. Not only are you paying a fine, but they give you points which increase your insurance. But if you drive like a red-blooded man, chances are you’re gonna get one. So here’s what you do according to our cop.

If you don't have tits, then here's what you do..

1.) Turn off the car, turn on the interior lights, lower windows (back ones too if you have tints), and then keep your hands on the steering wheel

Cops have a stressful job. They don’t only deal with nice people like you and I, but the majority of their calls are to crazies. Help remove the tension from the situation by showing that you are not going to run, are a rational human being, and understand the severity of the circumstances.

2.) Submit

Every day cops deal with people that argue, fight, and question their authority. Don’t be that guy.

You ever see a submissive dog roll on it’s back to show it’s belly? Be that dog.

Swallow your pride and things will go much smoother for you. So be polite, do exactly what the officer says, and don’t plead your case until the officer gives you an opportunity to.

3.) Charm the Officer

When it boils down to it. Cops are human beings. They want the same things everyone else does. To be appreciated, respected and sympathized with. You show them all three, and you might just get a warning.

But we at The Haute Spot don’t work on “might,” we like sure things. So like we always do- we have given you a script on exactly what to say:

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over today?

You: (Say this quickly, and don’t let the officer interrupt you until you finish) Yes I do officer, and I completely apologize. If you want to give me a ticket I completely understand, because you are just doing your job, and guys like you keep the bad guys off the street.

Someones heart just melted. Stonewall Jackson has become Little Bo Peep. You have just given the officer everything he could’ve asked for: appreciation, respect, and sympathy. Nine times out of ten, the officer will go back to his car check for warrants. If you’ve got a clean record, he will most likely let you get off with a warning.  Congratulations. No need to thank us.

Now what happens if he still gives you a ticket…

Chances are if he goes to his car before you can plead your case, he’s coming back with the ticket. So don’t let him leave without asking to speak to him. But sometimes, it’s just out of your control. While there’s technically no “quota,” they still get pressure to write a certain amount of tickets. Or the officer may just be having a bad day.

Regardless, you need to protect yourself.

Notice our wording. We never actually admitted to anything. We just admitted to doing something wrong, and apologized.

This is key because admission makes it very difficult to fight the ticket in court. If he hands you a ticket for speeding, act shocked.

YOU: Speeding? I thought this was for my broken taillight (assuming you DON’T have a broken taillight)

Then you can just go on following the advice from our friends at lifehacker

Just a few more things:

1.) Make your case, but continue to be nice. You want the officer to forget you so he’s less likely to show in court- which is an automatic dismissal of the case for you.

2.) Don’t hire a traffic lawyer. Show up yourself. Traffic lawyers are sweat shops. They have so many cases they rarely do anything more then file paperwork for you, and hardly get anything done that you can’t do yourself.

Plus it gives the impression that you don’t care about the ticket, and are probably guilty. Showing up yourself- in a suit- shows personal attention and a perceived innocence, because you care so much about the ticket.

3.) Lastly, don’t forget the dates. The pre-trial and the actual trial. I know it seems basic, but it’s happened before. Mark you calendar and show up on time. If you don’t show up, you’re automatically guilty, so you have to pay the fine and all the points and insurance increases that come with it.

Good Luck and Happy Hunting