Rolex Submariner

One watch that reignited out passion for horology this week is the Rolex Submariner. Five years ago it was considered too simple by many. It looked shy and meek next to those ubiquitous 50mm Breitlings, yet a few years later, the submariner remains king. It’s confident elegance and charming charisma has withstood the test of time, remaining relatively unchanged since the 1960′s (Don’t kill us Ben), this iconic classic will be just as gorgeous 10 years from now, as it is today.

If you’re going to invest in a time piece, or get one as a gift, you could do a lot worse than this.

BUY IT Rolex Submariner $5,000

1.) Recognize these opportunities, and

2.) Properly negotiating a win-win situation for both sides.

Negotiation is one the most essential survival skills a modern man can hope to acquire. It is an essential skill for sales, your career, and even your love life.

And there is no such thing as a no sale call. A sale is made on every call you make. Either you sell the client some stock or he sells you a reason he can’t. Either way a sale is made, the only question is who is gonna close? You or him? Now be relentless, that’s it, I’m done.-JIM YOUNG “Boiler Room”

A successful negotiation ends up serving both you, and your partner. (We call them partner as opposed to adversary or opponent, because a successful negotion should end up as a win-win). Here is the one tip we feel is critical to any successful negotiation.

Focus on your partner’s point of view

There is nothing more critical to a successful negotation, than to understand exactly what your partner in negotiation is thinking.

I once knew a car salesman that was absolutely ruthless when it came to his sales. He worked in a Southern California Toyata dealearship, and he was notorious for his diabolical deals, and excellent salesmanship. He once convinced someone to pay $700 a month for a car that should not have cost anyone, even with the worst credit, more than $400/month. He was a legend at his office. However one day he was duped.

Recon

A customer came in, and instead of focusing on strict pricing, he engaged, and even befriended this salesman! He came in and spent a few hours with the salesman, and eventually began talking about his job. The man was very open and honest about this own salary, debts, and even included some self-depracating humor, which disarmed the salesman. So when he asked him how much commission was typically made on each sale, the salesman, although reluctantly, felt obligated to reveal this information. He explained how most commision comes from not just the sale of the car, but the sale of extra add ons. He even revealed that they would get a bonus if they reached certain milestones for selling a certain number of cars per month.

Execution

With this information, the man took his time, and would visit the same salesman every few weeks, kick a few tires, and convince him he was ready to buy, as long as they could agree on a price, which somehow they could never agree to. He would then casually ask him, how many cars he sold this month. Gloatingly, the salesman would oblige, and proudfully show off his accomplishment. They had now developed a relationship, so the compliments came naturally.

Well, on the second month, the man came in on the last day of the month, a tuesday night. Store was close to closing, and as luck would have it, the salesman was down 1 car in order to reach his quota, something that would give him a huge bonus on his next paycheck. The average person walking into a dealership would never be privy to this information. So, the man did not discuss the details of the car, only enticing the salesman with the prospect of reaching his quota, and getting his bonus. He focused on his partner’s point of view.

Results

After a little back and forth, and even a threat or two of walking out, he walked out of that dealership with not only the lowest deal in the salesman’s history, but also the dealerships. The amount of time invested, the perfect timing executed by the man, and the man’s patience all led to him saving thousands of dollars-buying the car well under invoice.

The man got his car at a better price than he wanted, the salesman got his bonus and his quota, and both parties were happy.

You see if you focus on the partner’s point of view instead of your own, you can accomplish much more and end up with a win-win situation.

Oh by the way, when the first bill came, he paid for the entire car cash, effectively saving him another few thousand dollars in interest.

Win. Win.

Boys will be boys...

Boys will be boys, but being knotty just might be fashionable some day; the day you receive an invitation to a black-tie, or other formal affair. What you wear is just as important as how you wear it, whether attending a wedding, funeral, or crashing a Presidential State Dinner. Looking dapper and debonair, with a touch of culture and refinement, is the goal of every modern-day gent when faced with such an occasion. With this in mind, what’s all the fuss over 50+ inches of silk, and what’s with all those knots, anyway?  

The necktie, along with its forerunner the cravat, has been a predominately male fashion expression for centuries. Its origins can be traced to both military and royal attire of the early 17th century. Although an important piece of fashion history, there is no mandate that your formal ensemble conjure up memories of your father’s matching tie, handkerchief, and sock combinations. 

• The conservative look outranks all others within the professional arena. Keep things simple, while in a Corporate Environment or during a Job Interview, by wearing a dark suit, white dress shirt, and the classic, solid, navy-blue, or burgundy tie. Although a slight variation of tie color is acceptable, and simple prints are tolerated, avoid the temptation for bright colors or busy novelty prints at all costs; especially during the holiday season. 

•  When making a tie decision for Weddings, or other jubilant Celebrations, proceed with caution. Oftentimes, there are unspoken rules of etiquette for guests at a wedding, or other formal engagement. If you are not in the wedding party, pay special attention to your invitation, and any attire requests from your host. If the celebration is a black-tie affair, keep it simple and go with tradition. In the absence of such a request, bear in mind that weddings generally have a color theme. Grooms frequently choose the tie colors of white, silver, gray, sage green, pink, lavender, yellow, and orange. If you are not privy to this information, stick with basic tie colors and dark suits rather than making an unsolicited fashion statement. Although an Ascot tie, or other formal neckwear is in order, be careful not to upstage the groom.   

• Without question, Funerals are a definite black-tie affair. Stick with a black, dark blue or gray suit with a tie of similar color.  Enough said.  

• For Dating or Romantic occasions, feel free to liven up your fashion ensemble with a dose of imagination. Create a look that is warm, inviting, and friendly, as there is no need for conservatism here. Break the monotony of tradition with a splash of vibrant color, a unique print or pattern, a distinctive tie or Ascot pin, wearing a decorative vest in lieu of a jacket, or a variation of the necktie altogether.

Whatever you decide, make certain that your apparel is clean, pressed, and properly fitted. To the latter, every gent will know his measurements (neck, chest, sleeve, waist, and inseam), and is re-sized from time-to-time, to account for changes in his physique.  

Lastly, if you’re the uncomplicated type, don’t fret over the Windsor knot, Half-Windsor knot, Pratt/Shelby knot, Four-in-Hand knot, Small knot, Prince Albert knot, Cross knot, Ascot (Ruche, Cocolupa, or Naud Gordien) knot, Jabot, Bow Tie, and which knot, not to wear. Ties of the clip-on and pre-tied variety are fashion, that is fortunately made simple. 

Now that you’re all tied up, could there be an additional benefit of wearing a necktie? It should come as no surprise that, for women, there’s something inexplicably titillating about a well-groomed gent in a tie; the three Cs to be exact.  If you could read her mind, she’d share that you appear to be in Control, exhibit a Command presence, and convey a sense of Confidence, all by wearing a tie!  Not to mention the extra points earned for your quotient of appeal.   So what are you waiting for? Enjoy any formal event while looking your best.  

Don’t be afraid to tie the knot. Wear it – a necktie – the modern gent’s fashion accessory. 

-K. Walsh  

Know your nose

Were the rules of attraction made to be broken? If not broken, perhaps, enhanced? Who’s to say, but one thing is for certain: finding the right mix of sensuality, and pheromone, is the kind of thing genies have socked away in bottles for centuries. What makes women find a particular man desirable? Every man has a special ‘something’ that makes him unique, be it charm, bicep dimension, the proverbial shoe size, or the PIN number to his debit card. The list is exhaustive, so, how will you set yourself apart? 

You won’t find the answer in your father’s Old Spice, or even in the old school of conventional masculine wisdom. Although your heart’s settled on a favorite aromatic love tonic, does it truly define you? Does it drive the woman in your life passionately crazy, or does it drive her away? 

Give yourself a competitive edge, in the game of love, with the perfect scent for a sophisticated gent such as yourself.  Determine whether you prefer a strong and robust scent or a subtle, yet, clean and cool one. Whichever appeals to your senses, understand why this is so, by getting to know your nose.  From Giorgio Armani to Givenchy, and Ralph Lauren to Bvlgari, with so many scents from which to choose, how will you best decide? 

It’s in the notes. To be precise, the composition of any fine fragrance (male or female) is such that it will feature three distinct elements, or notes (top/head, middle/heart, and base), each unfolding over time; creating a symphony for the senses. Top notes offer an introductory scent that tends to be lighter, yet is highly volatile. Chances are you purchased your favorite scent based on this particular note. Top notes evaporate quickly, so allow a fragrance time to linger.  You will soon discover that the best of it has only begun. 

Enter the middle note. Often referred to as the heart of the fragrance, middle notes are strong and enduring. Remember that you are unique, and no two men will wear the same fragrance alike. When testing a fragrance, wear it no less than 15 minutes. In time, it will emit a signature aroma, as the elements fuse with your body’s natural chemistry. 

Last, but not least, are the base notes. These are the strongest ingredients of a fragrance, and serve as a fixative melding all other notes together. The base note provides for extended wear, of a fragrance, and prolongs its aromatic properties. 

All scents, from the impostor to the designer, belong to one of four distinct categories including Fresh, Floral, Oriental, and Woody (with a central trans-category of Aromatic Fougère). That’s right!  Contrary to popular belief, all fragrances are, in fact, cut from the same cloth.

By concentration, cologne contains 2 – 5% essential oils, and fragrance compounds, in contrast to perfumes, which contain upwards of 20%.  As nature’s perfect stimulants, essential oils induce certain euphoric and relaxing sentiments. Common notes used in male fragrances include Bergamot, Cedar, Ginger, Lavender, Neroli, Patchouli, Sandalwood, and Vetiver. It’s no accident that these are woody, aromatic, tranquil, and soothing. 

So what did Giovanni Paolo Feminis know that the rest of us would pay an arm and leg?  He knew that men deserve special recognition in their quest to enhance the rules of attraction.  In answering this masculine battle cry, Giovanni developed the perfect Scent for a Gent – his 1709 romantic elixir – cologne. Thus, the contemporary concept of male fashion cologne was born. The rest of this story can be found on Saks’ Fifth Avenue, your bedroom armoire, and in every department store worldwide.                                                                                                          

SCENT hints for a GENT:

1. Determine which notes are in your favorite cologne, or other fragrance.
2. Score some free samples online, or the next time you purchase at a department store.
3. Test no more than three scents at a time; any more will cloud your sense of smell.
4. The smell of coffee beans will clear the sinuses; the sales representative will have some.
5. Apply cologne to clean skin, most commonly after a shower.
6. Cologne should be worn on the body; hotspots include wrists, neck, and behind ears.
7. Rubbing wrists together will crush, or breakdown, a scent more rapidly. 
8. Spray cologne into the air, and walk into the mist for even distribution.
9. Store cologne in a cool, dry, place away from direct sunlight.
10. Properly stored cologne will last approximately three years. 

Now that you’ve got the basics, a little trial, and error, is in order. You hereby have permission to slather, spritz, and douse… within reason.

-K. Walsh

Examine your motivation. Have you been satisfied with your look until recently? If so, why have you decided to grow a goatee now? Does the new woman in your life drop hints, or, on occasion, make mention of how her ex had one? Did you recently lose a considerable amount of weight?  Are you going through what the rest of the world refers to as a midlife crisis, and want to feel young and virile again?  There are plenty of reasons, or non-reasons, to grow a goatee.  Be honest with yourself and examine your motivation.  Be certain that you are changing your look for you.  When you look into the mirror, you should like what you see – chin and all.  

Consider the time. Have you recently begun to grow your goatee?  In the beginning, your goatee may look somewhat awkward, or downright silly. Consider the time it will take to complete the look you want to achieve. Check your calendar. If your immediate plans, or obligations, include family or wedding photos, or an important speaking engagement, you may want to delay plans for your new chin friend, until a more suitable time. Look – into the mirror – before you leap, and allow your new goatee to grow in peace, not in pieces.

Consider the upkeep.  How much time will you spend grooming each day?  In order for your goatee to look its best, proper grooming is essential.  If you have minimal time for grooming, wearing a goatee style that requires a high level of maintenance may not be ideal. If your schedule is busy, but your heart is set on wearing a goatee, try opting for a simple style versus something more complex. 

Consider your occupation.  Even in the twenty-first century – the bottom line is – a goatee might not be acceptable to wear in certain occupations. Some employers ask that employees refrain from wearing certain styles of facial hair, or displaying certain types of  piercings, while in their employ, and/or on their premises. If your career path trumps your choice of beard expression, abandon this mission. For most, this will not be a problem, but do use your discretion.

 Understand the shape of your face.  Your goatee should enhance, or compliment your existing facial features. A large face with a narrowly trimmed goatee will appear out of proportion.  On the other hand, a small face with a long or extremely thick goatee will appear overpowered.  Keep in mind that a goatee is not a full beard, and, by definition, only refers to the tuft of hair grown from the chin.  This does grant you some leeway; however, understanding the shape of your face will help you make the best decision.  Round, square, and oval-shaped faces are all complimented by a goatee.  For those with a long face, an actual beard that is fuller on the sides, and short underneath the chin, will serve to create the illusion of being more balanced. 

Consider the style. Throughout history, men have donned various styles of facial hair, including the goatee.  Popularized in the 17th century, by the Flemish painter, Sir Anthony Van Dyck, there are many styles from which to choose.  Wear it alone, with a mustache, or accented by a soul patch (a tuft of hair grown directly below the bottom lip).  Experiment with any number of variations, always keeping your goatee trimmed, neat, and clean.

Don’t ditch the itch.  If you have recently begun to grow your goatee, you may find yourself irritated from the itching.  Be patient, and don’t be so quick to ditch the itch.  Although stubble can be quite annoying, the itching should be non-existent when your goatee has grown to the desired length.  To soothe an itchy chin, try using a dab of talcum powder.

Abandon the peach fuzz.  Be honest with yourself and face the facts: a few lone wiry hairs doth not a goatee make.  Growing a goatee may not be right for you, if it takes more than several weeks to achieve reasonable thickness, or denseness, in the chin hair.  Understand that genetics, and your overall health, determine the quantity, quality, and length of hair on any part of the body.  If the growth pattern of your goatee remains sparse, scraggly, or if you find your chin resembling fruit, it might be time to abandon the peach fuzz. 

Is it fair?  Hair color should not be the determining factor.  Contrary to popular belief, fair-haired goatees can be just as attractive as darker ones.  If you are fair-haired, allow your goatee, or beard, to grow-in before making your final decision.  Oftentimes, beard hair will be several shades darker, but even if this is not the case, a fair-haired goatee might be the right look for you. Lastly, if you are a mature gent, don’t be discouraged by gray hair.  Besides, who says a silver fox has to live on top of your head?  Many women find facial hair extremely attractive, and the more salt-n-pepper – the better.

Consider your partner.  Your partner may not be turned on by a vision of you with chin decorations, of the keratin kind.  Talk to your partner and find out what she thinks.  You may be surprised by her image of a sexier you.  Also, remember that during the awkward stubble phase, delivering a kiss with a tickle, or scratch, may not be on her list of approved romantic gestures. 

Whether you decide to Goatee or Go Bare, be adventurous and enjoy finding the right look for you.

-K. Walsh 

First Date Fiasco

Chances are you have probably been doing the dinner and a movie date for a while.

Or the dinner date.

Or the movie date.

These places are terrible for building attraction, they don’t highlight your personality, and they don’t foster affection. All key for securing a second date.

Here’s why they don’t work to your advantage.

If you are on a three-hour date, and the movie is 2 and a half-hours long, that is not a good way to get to know each other.

I understand the appeal of the movie- it eliminates awkward pauses in conversations.

I hate to break it to you, but if you’re on a first date, and you’re already having awkward pauses, chances are it wasn’t meant for the two of you to be together.

If you’re that worried about holding a conversation, at least take her to a comedy club so you’re not responsible for making her laugh (which you should anyway-constantly), and it gives you something to talk about after.

So do a little research, investigate some cafe’s in your area. Go to some dive bars. Ideally ones with bench seating so you can sit next to each other. Find a cool spot that you can take her to grab a drink, maybe some dessert and just talk and flirt.

You’ll end up spending less money if you don’t share chemistry, and you have more oppurtunities to play footsies if everything works out.

Regardless of the location, the goal of the date should be to get the kiss. And you can’t kiss without touching, and its very difficult to touch when you’re sitting across from her on a table eating who knows what.

You’ll probably be able to have more first dates now with less time, effort, and money, and eliminate a month of dating and hundreds of dollars only to realize it wasn’t meant to be.

Your wallet and your ego will thank you for it.

Good Luck and Happy Hunting.

-The Haute Spot

Here at BravadoLiving, we will explain the difference between parties that flourish, and those that flop. More importantly we will show you the way to stay in the former camp and develop a reputation for throwing the best parties known to man.

Crowd surfing: A good indicator that your party is a success

1.) Location

The number one rule in real estate applies to parties as well. Parking must be plentiful. Make sure that it’s not too far from your guests or they may be discouraged by the long drive. And if they do come, they may not drink for fear of driving under the influence.

Visit your neighbors.

Inform them that you are having a party for a special occasion. Give them your cell phone number and tell them to call you personally incase the party gets too loud – you can even extend a friendly invitation. This insures no one calls the cops and gets your party shut down.

Make sure you have plenty of room for a dance floor. Don’t leave anything valuable in a public place that can be broken or stolen.

2.) Reason and Theme

Now we’re not suggesting that you need a reason to throw a party, but it helps with the planning if you have one. A reason helps you to determine a theme (which we find to be crucial for any legendary party). The theme doesn’t need to be as exaggerated as a 70′s party, but even simple colors can help bring cohesion to an otherwise unorganized mess.Themes will turn a random house party something your guests talk about tomorrow, to a party they text about tonight.

"Get over here now! This party is awesome!

Sometimes finding a theme will be easy like Halloween or New Years (the most overrated night of partying of all time), or it may be a little more obscure- a surprise party for a friend.

If you don’t have a reason for throwing the party then feel free to pick from any one of the themes below:

1.) Any combination of colors (black, white, red, black and white, back and gold, black and silver, white and red, etc.)

These parties are great and usually very classy. Let guests know the dress code early and make it mandatory- even going as far as stating you will not be admitted if you are not dressed in theme. There’s nothing like having that one asshole who decided to wear a purple graphic shirt to your white party.

A Beach White Party

2.) Decade party (20′s,60′s, 70′s, 80′s, 90′s)

Hint: 80′s parties are irresistible to girls

3.) Heaven, Hell, Heaven and Hell

4.)Pirate theme

5.) ABC party- Anything But Clothes (garbage bags, duct tape, cardboard boxes etc.)

6.) School girl and Sexy Teachers Party

7.) G.I. Joe and Barbie Theme

8.) Superhero party

9.) Cowboys and Indians party

10.) Sports theme

11.) Wine or Champagne Tasting Party

-Everyone brings a bottle of wine. You cover each bottle by bag or paper and number them randomly. Everyone gets a sample of each bottle and rates them. Tally the scores and reveal the winners. The person who brought the best tasting wine wins a bottle to take home.

12.) Hawaiian Luau

13.) Mafia Party

14.) Lingerie/Playboy party

Now some of these themes may be a little too elementary for you, and some may be too high-brow, but it will give you a good launching point to help develop a successful party theme. Get the pulse of your female friends- they usually have a good sense of what the girls you know will get excited about going to.

Themes are important whether it's a house party or elegant Soiree

In fact get one of your hot female friends to help throw the party- both guys and girls tend to assume a party will be more fun when it’s thrown by a hot girl.

3.) Guest List

The guest list is vital. It will decide how successful the party will be. You want to aim for a 60/40 mix of women to men. Any more women and the party will be too catty. Any more men and it will look like a sword fight.

You should probably give guest list duties to someone else next time

Also be mindful of different social groups. A party is less fun when everyone knows each other. You want some guests to be strangers to each other at a party (this stimulates a fun chemistry), but you don’t want your hippy musician friends socializing with your boss from work. Be cognizant and recognize the social group of all your guests and try to invite like minded people.

Also be mindful that certain people won’t attend, so feel free to invite a few more people then you actually want attending. It’s always better to have a party that is too packed, then a party that is too empty.

4.) Invitations

Always start by developing a buzz via word of mouth. You want people to know that you are throwing a party soon. Use your hot friend to help accomplish this.

This can help develop an air of tension and anticipation for your party- especially if you have a reputation for throwing great parties (which you will after following our advice).

Once everything is set, and you have the date, time, and place decided, you can begin to invite people. You want to aim for at least 10 days before the party starts but never more then 3 weeks. This gives people enough time to prepare, girls enough time to go shopping for outfits, but it’s not so far ahead that people forget.

5.) Drinks

Probably the most vital thing at a party. Sure you can have fun without alcohol. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they’ve invented the lighter?

As a cardinal rule: The drunker the people at your party get, the more fun they will have.

The key is to have plenty of alcohol. Have it chilled and ready to drink before the party starts. Make all your mixed drinks and punches beforehand so you can play a good host rather than bartender.

Read our article on building an effective home bar so you’re always ready for an impromptu get together.

An Inviting Party Bar

But for the simple essentials just take this grocery list:

1.) A Keg: The most basic of party essentials. It will service a large amount of people for very cheap.

As a general guideline you don’t want to buy more expensive beer kegs. More expensive brands achieve a higher level of flavor by adding more hops- which although make the beer more flavorful, are also very filling (remember the cardinal rule).

For kegs, you actually want to spring for a cheaper beer- Bud Light or Miller Lite. These brands use rice as a substitution to more hops to help make the beer less filling and easier to drink. In fact “Light” beers were originally invented not for the health conscious but rather the heavy drinker.

Personally, we recommend Miller Lite for your Keg purchases. It may have the stigma as being a “girly” beer, however it has less carbonation and it is easier to drink than Bud Light which girls will appreciate. And guys will drink anything anyway.

2.) A Punch: If there is one thing you need for a party, it’s a bowl of punch.

Most girls don’t like beer- at least they don’t like it enough to drink it heavily. Which is why you should always have an alternative for your guests. We recommend this recipe from DrinksRecipe for Jungle Juice.

Jungle Juice Recipe

1 L Everclear® alcohol
5.25 L (3 1.75L bottles) vodka
1 bottle peach schnapps
1 pint Bacardi® 151 rum
1 bottle 99 Apples® apple schnapps
10 L Sprite® soda
1 L Sunny Delight® orange juice
1 L triple sec
1.75 L bottle gin
1 bottle DeKuyper® Sour Apple Pucker schnapps
4 bottles Boone’s Farm® Strawberry Hill wine
8 L Hawaiian Punch®
2 containers orange juice concentrate
fruit (as much as desired)

Mix all the ingredients in a Coach’s Cooler or similar apparatus. Add the fruit and let it soak overnight. Use dry ice in a ziplock bag to help keep it cold and prevent the dry ice from melting into the recipe. Add regular ice before you serve, and add water to taste, but honestly, you can barely taste the alcohol as it is, making this a very dangerous party starter.

One cup has about 15% alcohol or the equivalent of 3 beers. After 2 or 3 cups, you can imagine how fun your party will be. The concoction is expensive to make- approximately $200 per batch depending on your location so feel free to remove some of the ingredients as you see fit- if the punch tastes like juice to begin with, removing any of the alcohol wont’t hurt.

Feel free to put some punch in a serving bowl and ladle added with fruit so your guests can serve themselves. The fruit will have a lot of alcohol naturally soaked into it, so biting into it will just provide your juice with an added punch (no pun intended).

3.) The Basics: Any party can have a keg and a bowl of punch. The best parties have a slew of alcohol to choose from displayed broadly as if saying- money is no object.

1.) A great sipping whisky (Macallan’s 18, Highland Park 21, Blue Label)

2.) A great mixing whiskey (Dewer’s 12, Crown Royal, Maker’s Mark, Black Label)

3.) A premium bottle of vodka (Belvedere or Grey Goose, and Ketel One)

4.) A great Reposado or Blanco Tequila (4 Copas, Gran Patron Silver, 1921- great for shots to help get the party started)

5.) A great selection of beers (Lagers, Dunkels, anything for the discerning beer drinker)

6.) Champagne (It’s a celebration)

7.) Amaretto (For making amaretto sours- only for girls that don’t like the taste of alcohol)

8.) Respectable selection of wines (Red, Whites, Chardonnay, Sovereign Blanc, Zinfandel, etc)

9.) Extra’s: Ice! (Get As many bags as you think you need, then get 5 more), Quality glasses, Large Heavy Duty Shaker (don’t put anything carbonated in it- rookie mistake), Towels

10.) Mixers: Soda’s, Sour mix, Juices, etc.

11.) Garnishes: Lemon and Lime Wedges, Olives, Toothpicks, and Precut lemon and lime twists (Nothing makes a drink fancier than a twist- for girls only)

12.) Something impressive to put it all in (Go dark wood, with darker leather)

4.) The unsung heroes: Cups and Ice

I have seen many great parties go downhill because people ran out of the simplest things. No one wants to wait while someone goes on a quick run to grab more cups or ice.

Even worse is running out of alcohol. It’s as if the music stops the second the last beer is cracked open. Trust us- it’s not pretty.

Also a true gentleman doesn’t throw a BYOB party. At least if you’re over 27.

5.) Food: No

Unless it’s a dinner party we would shy away from foods. People come to parties to have a good time, not get fed.

Food sobers you up, makes your breath smell, and is generally unattractive. There’s nothing sexy about typical party foods- chips, salsa, pizza etc.

If you insist, keep the food items clean- fruits, hors’dourves, steaks. Shy away from spaghetti, fish, or anything greasy.

And leave out a plate of dinner mints to help bring the party back to it’s original glory.

6.) Sense of Arrival: The most important decorations of your party

When people pull into your party and see the venue in the distance, whether it’s your house or a banquet hall you want them to get excited. You want to decorate the outside of the venue with a sense of importance.

This subtle distinction will make the difference between “Showing up” and “You’ve arrived.”

You want to create a “Sense of Arrival.”

You can do this in many ways.

A.) Balloon Arch: A balloon arch is great for indoor events. It is very labor intensive but if you have a couple girls helping you then you have a very classy and cheap way to build an entrance.

B.) Tiki Torches: This is our favorite way to create the impression of a truly great party. A few strategically placed Tiki Torches creating a pathway leading towards the entrance will transform a “get-together” to a “Soiree.”

Tiki Torches Always Create A "Sense of Arrival"

C.) Ice Sculpture: If you have the money, there is really no better way to wow your guests. Places strategically in the lobby or hallway of your party, a well made Ice Sculpture will shock your guests, make a perfect backdrop for pictures, and truly leave a lasting memory for all your guests.

Epic Ice Sculpture

7.) Decorations

Cut a check. Give it to the girls. Let them go crazy. Trust us.

8.) Music

If alcohol is the lighter, then music is the gasoline. Hiring a DJ should definitely be part of your budget. Don’t take recommendations, make sure you have personally seen the DJ spin.

You want a DJ that can easily transition from one song to the next, but more importantly a DJ that can effectively read a crowd and know exactly what song to play next. Anyone can play a pre-recorded podcast from a famous DJ, but it takes real skill to play the perfect song for that particular crowd.

A Solid Dj is Important

A good DJ will start out with mild lounge music as people are mingling and developing their buzz. He won’t waste good songs when no one is dancing.

He will know exactly when to start playing the hits to coax the crowd onto the dance floor. And he will know exactly what songs to play to keep them glued there.

Feel free to give the DJ a few songs that you would like to be played throughout the night, but if he’s a professional- mostly just let him do his job.

If a DJ isn’t in your budget, make sure to make a playlist of songs designed well in advance of the party.

Ideally you will make two playlists: one of mellow techno, jazz, and Sinatra as people are entering the party.

Then a second full of the greatest dance hits once the party gets popping.

A Good Dj will coax people to the dance floor

Having a preset playlist will ensure that you don’t have a crowd of “experts” crowding around the Ipod trying to decide what to play next.

9.) Dancing

If the drinks are cold, the crowd is right, and the music is good, dancing is inevitable.

There are a few things you can do to help grease the system. Make sure you have a dance floor that is in front of the DJ.

There’s something about a solid piece of concrete, wood, or tile in front of a DJ system that makes people want to dance. People just don’t like dancing on grass or uneven surfaces, for obvious reasons.

Dancing is essential for any great party

Make sure the area is well air-conditioned or cool. If the party is too hot, you invited too many people for your venue which is bad planning on your part.

Don’t throw an outdoor party if you live in a humid location. People will avoid dancing because they don’t want to sweat, which is bad planning on your part.

The most important thing you can do to ensure people start dancing is keep the lights low. Your whole party should have a level of ambiance similar to a candlelit dinner (without the candles, those are dangerous and will start a fire).

Everyone looks better in a dim light, and are more inclined to dance if they feel they can hide in the shadows and the crowd. So turn off a few lights, install a dimmer, or shade a few lightbulbs, and let the organic flow of your party develop.

Low light doesn't hide everyone's dancing, though

If people are still shying away from the dance floor you can always tell the DJ that if anyone requests to play a song, he makes it mandatory that they dance to it. No one wants to be the first person on the dance floor. You can wait for someone to get drunk (brave) enough to try, or you can force it yourself.

10.) Being a Good Host

Take care of all the other rules well before the party starts because you will need to devote your time and energy to rule number ten.

This is the most important rule of throwing a great party.

Greet every guest at the door, whether they are a stranger or close friend. Welcome them to your party. Grab a drink for them and tell them to help themselves for another round. Then cordially pass them off to someone they know so they can feel comfortable.

Never stay with one group for too long. Be sure to introduce guests to each other. You must be a director of fun at your party and ensure that everyone is enjoying their time.

If you feel the party needs a spark you can always play one of my favorite drinking games- Flip Cup

Flip cup requires a long table, a pitcher of beer or punch and several plastic cups.

Teams of three or more will line up on opposite sides of the table with cups, half full of drink.

Then during every round you start at one end of the table, chugging your cup and then placing the cup on the edge of the table and “flipping” it until the cup lands top side down. The next person doesn’t begin chugging until the person before them has finished successfully ”flipping” his cup.

First team to finish flipping all of the cups wins.

Flip cup to help get the party started

Before every round make sure that both teams start by clapping and making noise, and then the first two opponents tap cups and then chug. This creates a lot of commosion and makes the party look a lot more fun and lively than it actually is.

This works especially well for parties that are just beginning. It is a lot better to see a small group of people cheering and playing this game, then sitting around waiting for the party to start.

Execution

If you keep up with these rules, you should immediately develop a reputation for throwing magnificent parties. Don’t skimp on any of the details. It only takes one great party to be crowned the “Diddy” of your friends, but it only takes one bad party to completely shatter that repuation.

Hope you have a great time throwing your next party.

Wilder things have happened

Good Luck and Happy Hunting.

-Bravado Living

Also, make sure to keep an eye on your guests and don’t let anyone drive home intoxicated.

It is ALWAYS ok to approach women.

You will date 0% of the women you never approach.

Here’s how you do it without looking like a douche:

1.)Change your attitude
First you need to get rid of that strong, silent attitude most guys in the gym have. It seems like every guy in the gym has a look on his face that screams

“I wish I was taller.”

Don’t be that guy.

Instead get to know everyone. Guys and girls. Know them by name. Get your workout in, but don’t neglect being social. That way you get noticed as a naturally social butterfly and it won’t seem creepy when you approach strangers.

2.) Approach her

If she’s wearing headphones and in the zone- leave her be.

If not, or better yet if she makes eye contact with you, you have a green light.

-Ask her if you can work in on her machine
Very simple and innocent. Ask her how many sets she has left and if you can work in with her. Be sure to towel off between sets so she doesn’t get grossed out.

-Ask her for a spot
A little more bold, and a little too obvious. Why would you ask her for a spot when there are tons of capable guys around.

But it can be done. I would put on an embarrassingly low amount of weight and pretend to struggle-who knows, you may get a laugh, and it won’t look like you’re trying to impress her.

-Ask her about a particular machine
Woman love using machines that guys would never touch. The leg abductor, the tricep kickback machine, the laying leg curl, you get the picture. Machines you know men shouldn’t be using.
It’s still a great opportunity to strike up a conversation. Ask her if it works, how to do it, does she get sore, etc.

3.) Ask for her name
This is very important because unless you look like Brad Pitt, you probably won’t be taking her home the same day.

And here is where the magic happens…

You leave.

That’s right! You excuse yourself. Thank her for the spot/laugh/tip and you don’t talk to her again.

You see, most girls that you meet at the gym are members. This means they will probably be back, and usually at the same times.

Therefore, you WILL probably see her again.

And when you do, you will say hello to her.

By name.

Do you see what happened? You went from the guy hitting on her at the gym, to the cool, funny, nice guy at the gym.

Completely innocent- and totally in.

4.)Small talk and getting her to laugh

Make sure to smile.

Say hi every time you see her in the gym. Tell her that calf exercise she told you about made you really sore :p (yeah, right).

Tease her for not seeing her enough, tell her she’s been slacking on her workout. That she’s been staying home and reading too many Twilight books and not taking her workout seriously. Anything to make her laugh.

If she defends her workout: Ask her to flex her bicep for you. When she flexes it hard, give it a gentle squeeze- then tell her

“Ok, now flex.” with your coy cocky smile.

She’ll instantly laugh and say “I AM flexing”

Tell her that you stopped working out so much because you started getting too big and were scaring little children.

Anything to make her laugh.

5.) Ask her out

You’re in. It’s time to go in for the kill.

Congratulations, you are no longer the douche that approached her at the gym.

You’re the awesome guy taking her out for her drinks this weekend.

-Good Luck and Happy Hunting

Bravado Living

1.) Inspection

Common CIgar Sizes

There are many camps on how to light a cigar. Some say you can only use a cedar spill. Some say you can only use a butane lighter. Some say you need a cutter. Some say real cigar aficionado’s use thier teeth. Whatever the theory may be, they all begin the same way..

Take the cigar our of the cellophane wrapper.

Cigar smoking is a love affair. You don’t just throw it in your mouth and puff away. Appreciate the cigar for what it is –A hand-rolled masterpiece. Anyone that has ever seen a cigar being made knows the level of craftsmanship that goes into creating a cigar. The amount of care and detail, and the level of quality of the ingredients makes it amazing that you can buy them for $10 a stick.

First let’s discuss the different parts of the cigar.

The bottom of the cigar where you can see the open tobacco is called the foot.

Cigar Foot

This is the part you light.

The other rounded end is called the cap or head.

Head, Shoulder and Cap of a Ciar

It is sealed so you will need to cut it open in order to properly draw in smoke. The rest of the cigar is composed of the filler, the tobacco inside of the cigar. This is all held together by the wrapper, which is the outside leaf that holds the filler together.

The glue used to hold this beauty together is vegetable based and non-toxic. Some companies even use sap to give a hint of molasses to their cigars.

So inspect the cigar. Gently squeeze it and feel for lumps. Notice if the outside leaf has any veins. Finally smell the tobacco. A properly humidified cigar will have a damp tobacco smell.

A cigar that has been improperly stored or dried out will feel dry in the hand, may crunch when squeezed lightly, have rips and breaks in the wrapper, and smell slightly stale, like the clothes of a smoker.

Avoid Bad Cigars

If you are purchasing the cigar for yourself, go with a “mild” flavored cigar. Don’t be afraid to ask for a recommendation from the store owner, they love talking about their passion. Go for a smaller sized cigar to acclimate your taste buds. Typically the lighter in color the wrapper, the less intense the flavor. A “Maduro” or dark colored cigar may be too strong for some, but that’s what I started smoking with, so it can be done.

2.) Cut the Cigar

Look closely at the head of the cigar and you will see the cap.

Cigar Cap

The cap is a slightly different color than the rest of the cigar and looks similar to a Yakima on the top of the cigar. This is what you will cut in order to smoke a cigar.

The Perfect Cut

You must be careful however.

The cap is crucial and must remain intact for fear of the cigar unraveling. The most common mistake cigar smokers make is cutting off too much of the cap, or even worse, actually cutting into the cigar wrapper.

Way too much

The hole needed to smoke a cigar is a lot smaller then you think, about the size of a pencil eraser. So when cutting the cigar make sure to only cut off only a small amount. You can always make a hole bigger, but you can never undue the damage caused by cutting off to much.

Ok so now that you understand what needs to be done we will explain the tools:

Cigar Punch: The easiest way to cut a cigar is with a cigar punch. It is merely a round blade that will cleanly “punch” a hole through the cap. If you want a larger hole you can simply punch the cigar several times until the hole is large enough.

Cigar Punch

Cigar Guillotine: The cigar guillitoine is a double edged cutter that will cleanly cut the cigar from both ends.

Cigar Guillotine

The best way to cut with the guillotine is to gently rest the blades on the cigar so you can see where it will cut and then snip quickly and cleanly. This is our personal favorite cutter as it gives you the most freedom as the the size of the hole. We recommend the Xikar Cuttar as it is self sharpening,

Table Top V-Cutter: Usually seen in cigar shops, this is another fool-proof method of cutting a cutter.

V Cut Cigar Cutter

You merely insert the cigar and pull down on the lever and the cutter will cleanly shave a V-shaped opening at the head of the cigar.

V Cut CIgar

Personally, I feel the draw is too tight with this cutter and my cigar ends up being too hard to smoke, but it’s definitely worth a try.

Cigar Scissors: Self-Explanatory. Should work similarly to the guillotine cutter, but I’ve had terrible results and ruined many great cigars.

Cigar Scissors

They look great but aren’t gentle enough

Your Teeth: Only use as a last resort. Even a knife, pen, or key would be better suited to punch a hole in a cigar. But if you must, then nibble cleanly a small hole in the cap being careful not to accidentally pull the cap completely off.

Pull the tobacco from your lip with your fingers. Never Spit. It’s not effective. You will merely look like a bug landed on your lip and will ended up using your fingers anyway.

3.) Test the draw

Once the cigar is cut, puff on the cigar and see if the draw is too your liking. You should have to use a little pressure to get air flowing into your mouth.

If the cigar draws too open and allows too much air, the cigar will burn hot, quickly, and will mask the real flavor of the leaf. You cut off too much.

If the cigar draws too tight and is very difficult to puff, the cigar will burn cold and be frustratingly difficult to keep lit. Open the cut slightly.

If the cigar still draws tight, it might have a knot. Gentle squeeze the cigar and feel for any lumps, if the lump is near the foot of the cigar, consider cutting the section off and smoking the rest. If cutting is not an option, then use a small wire (paperclip) and very gently poke the knot to loosen the area. Be careful to not rip the wrapper or ruin the rest of the cigar. Usually this will help alleviate the problem, and save the stubborn cigar.

4.) Lighting the Cigar

First, remove any wrappers or labels located near the foot of the cigar if they have one.

Never use a candle, a liquid fueled lighter, or any other questionable source of flame. They will all ruin the taste of the cigar.

There are only three ways to light a cigar. Using a match, a cedar spill, or butane lighter.

Match: Light the match and let the match burn down slightly. The initial spark from a match comes from the sulphur and while it does make a larger flame, will impart a sour taste in your cigar. It will take several matches to properly light the cigar and get an even burn.

Although improper etiquette, feel free to puff the cigar under the flame to help jump the flame onto the tobacco. This will help get the cigar lit quickly and will use less matches.

Lighting a cigar with a match

If the number of matches is of no concern, then jump down to the butane lighter technique and use the same theory.

Cedar Spill: The most romantic of cigar lighting techniques. Commonly found in premium cigar shops, cedar strips or “spills” are strips of cedar, that can be used to create an aromatic even burning light. They can be found as dividers of cigar boxes or purchased separately.

Cedar Spills

Regardless of acquisition, they require the same technique as butane lighters, so just continue reading below.

Butane Lighters: The easiest and preferred method of lighting a cigar, butane lighters provide the most control and most even burning flame. You are looking for a lighter with a strong jet blue flame.

Cigar Torch

Some companies even sell lighters with two, three, or even four flames, but we feel that ruins the romance and allure of lighting a cigar. So here’s the proper gentlemanly way to do it:

Torch the foot: No we’re not torturing anyone here. We merely mean to light the foot of the cigar. Proper technique requires you to hold the cigar at a 45 degree angle above the flame and allow the cigar to flirt with the heat of the lighter- never directly placing the cigar in the flame (which will char the tobacco and impart a poor flavor).

Lighting a cigar

This requires time and patience, which is a necessity for cigar smoking. A small cigar will require at least half an hour of your time, and a larger cigar may take over an hour to fully enjoy. Lighting a cigar is part of the experience so don’t rush it.

Rolling: Continue to roll the cigar in the heat until you get an even burn emanating from the foot of the cigar. Feel free to blow on the cigar to help increase the heat on a particular section to ensure an even burn.

Ensuring an evenly lit cigar

Continue this process until you are satisfied that the cigar is properly lit.

Avoid puffing on the cigar while it is being lit, this will cause the flame to jump charring the tobacco and inhaling noxious fumes which alter the taste of the tobacco.

No

Puffing: Instead, after the cigar is lit, blow gently to remove any char/fumes that may impart a sour taste, inspect the burn, and then get ready to enjoy the cigar.

5.) Holding the cigar: You don’t hold a cigar like a cigarette. You hold it between your thumb and forefinger, letting it rest gently on the edge of your middle finger if you please.

Holding a Cigar, Notice the even burn

Keep the cigar in your hand and at your hip. Let it rest on an ashtray only if you are leaving the area.

Be mindful or wind direction from blowing on your cigar which will affect the even burn, and where the smoke is blowing- not everyone loves the smell of tobacco, and a true gentlemen never makes anyone feel uncomfortable, even unintentionally.

6.) Actually smoking the cigar: Ok enough foreplay. How to actually smoke a cigar.

Cigar smoke is very harsh and will cause you to cough so the key is to not inhale.

Easier said than done.

The trick, for those not used to breathing in without inhaling, is to take a deep breath, and the puff on the cigar.This will make it impossible for you to accidentally inhale the tobacco smoke. Once the cigar smoke is in your mouth, let it linger for a while,  and then breathe it out. Rinse. And  Repeat.

Congratulations, this may be your first cigar but everyone at the table thinks you’re a cigar aficionado.

Constantly check the cigar to ensure an even burn is maintained. Feel free to blow on the foot of the cigar if you feel a section is not keeping up, or in extreme cases you may use your lighter to speed up the process.

Cigar smoking does create a large amount of saliva which some find annoying. So if for the company is appropriate, and you are outdoors and near grass, feel free to spit. Do this cleanly and sparingly. Amongst proper guests, and indoors, suck it up and swallow.

7.)Remove the band: After a few puffs, the heat from the cigar will melt the glue on the wrapper, please remove it now. Leaving a wrapper on a cigar is controversial, and there are two camps of theory. Those in Europe and the Middle East consider it a sign of arrogance and showmanship, those in North and South America see it as optional.

Personally, it is better to err on the side of conservatism and simply remove the cigar label. Sure someone might think your Ed Hardy shirt is cool, but chances are people will think you’re a douche. Leaving a label on is for amateurs,

8.) Tasting the cigar:Typically, the first few times you smoke a cigar, you won’t be able to taste anything or truly appreciate the cigar. Your taste buds will simply tingle as they acclimate to the smoke. Similar to drinking your first beer, or sipping your first glass of wine. It may take several sticks to get used to the smoke and develop a taste for the cigar.

Once you get used to smoking a cigar, after several puffs, as the ash develops, and the cigar begins to burn cooler you will have a better sense of the taste of the cigar- usually about halfway down the cigar all the way to just below of the shoulder of the cigar (the sweet spot). Smoking will cause the flavor to concentrate in the bottom half of the cigar so while the first half of the cigar may taste empty and light, the bottom half will taste rich.

Let the smoke swirl in your mouth, cool down, and allow your tongue to bathe in the flavors. Note the hints of leather, chocolate, coffee, honey, and wood in your tobacco.

Also note the body of the smoke. A mild cigar will have the body of skim milk, while a full bodied cigar will feel like heavy cream in your mouth.

Hint: Write down your own personal review on the back of the wrapper and save them for later. You can help use this system to determine what cigars to buy next by knowing what you like, and what you don’t like. How will you ever know that you like Amberbock if you keep buying Guiness?

9.) Ashing the Cigar: Don’t worry about ashing a cigar. The long ash of a cigar is an indication of a well made stick. It also helps to cool down the burn of the cigar. This lets a cooler smoke enter your mouth and allows for a better tasting experience. Don’t worry about the ash falling on your clothes, it wipes clean (I know from experience).

The only time I would recommend ashing a cigar is if the cigar has gone out, or is about to go out. If that’s the case then follow these steps.

Relighting a Cigar

Ashing a cigar is easy. You merely gently tap it against the ashtray until the ash falls off. The problem is the char. If you relight the char it will be acidic and bitter. Feel free to blow on the cigar to help dislodge the ash or tap it lightly to cause to fall out, then simply follow the same technique you used before to initially light the cigar. You can also cut the cigar and begin a new.

Regardless it may take a while for the cigar to stabilize and return to it’s original flavor. Don’t let that discourage you, relighting a cigar is very common and is a skill that needs to be mastered if you ever intend on making cigar smoking a part of your lifestyle.

10.) Extinguishing the Cigar

When the flame gets too close for comfort, time is up, or you wish to save the rest of the cigar for later, there comes a time to extinguish the cigar.

The proper way is to let it die gently in an ash tray.

Do not try and press the flame out. This will cause the cigar to smoke heavily and leave an awful acrid smell that will not easily be removed. Cigar smoke usually dissipates within a few hours indoors, but extingusing a cigar by force in this manner and you will have a much harder time.

Also never leave a cold cigar for too long indoors as the same effect will occur.

Once the cigar has died, ensure the flame is extinguished by touching the foot gently. If it is too warm to touch, it is too warm to discard and could cause a fire hazard. Once properly cooled, feel free to discard, or place back into the cellophane wrapper and save it for later.

With these rules you should be well on your way to enjoying one of life’s simplest treasures. Churchill, Hemmingway, and all the Cubans on Calle Ocho can’t be wrong. Cigar smoking isn’t just a hobby, it’s a way of life.

Tickets are nasty. Not only are you paying a fine, but they give you points which increase your insurance. But if you drive like a red-blooded man, chances are you’re gonna get one. So here’s what you do according to our cop.

If you don't have tits, then here's what you do..

1.) Turn off the car, turn on the interior lights, lower windows (back ones too if you have tints), and then keep your hands on the steering wheel

Cops have a stressful job. They don’t only deal with nice people like you and I, but the majority of their calls are to crazies. Help remove the tension from the situation by showing that you are not going to run, are a rational human being, and understand the severity of the circumstances.

2.) Submit

Every day cops deal with people that argue, fight, and question their authority. Don’t be that guy.

You ever see a submissive dog roll on it’s back to show it’s belly? Be that dog.

Swallow your pride and things will go much smoother for you. So be polite, do exactly what the officer says, and don’t plead your case until the officer gives you an opportunity to.

3.) Charm the Officer

When it boils down to it. Cops are human beings. They want the same things everyone else does. To be appreciated, respected and sympathized with. You show them all three, and you might just get a warning.

But we at The Haute Spot don’t work on “might,” we like sure things. So like we always do- we have given you a script on exactly what to say:

Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over today?

You: (Say this quickly, and don’t let the officer interrupt you until you finish) Yes I do officer, and I completely apologize. If you want to give me a ticket I completely understand, because you are just doing your job, and guys like you keep the bad guys off the street.

Someones heart just melted. Stonewall Jackson has become Little Bo Peep. You have just given the officer everything he could’ve asked for: appreciation, respect, and sympathy. Nine times out of ten, the officer will go back to his car check for warrants. If you’ve got a clean record, he will most likely let you get off with a warning.  Congratulations. No need to thank us.

Now what happens if he still gives you a ticket…

Chances are if he goes to his car before you can plead your case, he’s coming back with the ticket. So don’t let him leave without asking to speak to him. But sometimes, it’s just out of your control. While there’s technically no “quota,” they still get pressure to write a certain amount of tickets. Or the officer may just be having a bad day.

Regardless, you need to protect yourself.

Notice our wording. We never actually admitted to anything. We just admitted to doing something wrong, and apologized.

This is key because admission makes it very difficult to fight the ticket in court. If he hands you a ticket for speeding, act shocked.

YOU: Speeding? I thought this was for my broken taillight (assuming you DON’T have a broken taillight)

Then you can just go on following the advice from our friends at lifehacker

Just a few more things:

1.) Make your case, but continue to be nice. You want the officer to forget you so he’s less likely to show in court- which is an automatic dismissal of the case for you.

2.) Don’t hire a traffic lawyer. Show up yourself. Traffic lawyers are sweat shops. They have so many cases they rarely do anything more then file paperwork for you, and hardly get anything done that you can’t do yourself.

Plus it gives the impression that you don’t care about the ticket, and are probably guilty. Showing up yourself- in a suit- shows personal attention and a perceived innocence, because you care so much about the ticket.

3.) Lastly, don’t forget the dates. The pre-trial and the actual trial. I know it seems basic, but it’s happened before. Mark you calendar and show up on time. If you don’t show up, you’re automatically guilty, so you have to pay the fine and all the points and insurance increases that come with it.

Good Luck and Happy Hunting